There have been numerous suggestions made about Arsenal’s inability to put the ball in the back of the net of late. But today I’m here to tell you that they’re all wrong. Every single one of them.
It has nothing to do with the effort our players are putting in. Nothing to do with the lack of sharpness and skill going forward. And it certainly has nothing to do with our extended injury list. Nope, it’s much, much simpler than that. Arsenal are cursed.
And it’s all because of Morgana Clarke.
Let me explain. Morgana Clarke is a friend of a friend of mine who has become a friend mine. She’s never been overly interested in football of any kind, be it games featuring our local club the Queensland Roar, the Australian national team or my beloved Arsenal. She’s never really seen the enjoyment in watching football and has never felt the need to get involved.
Recently, however, that has changed.
As a favour of sorts to me Morgana was kind enough to have a read of this blog and as a result, become quite interested in the Arsenal Football Club. She became intrigued about the names of the players and the community on the blog and became determined to get involved.
That determination lead her to accompany myself – as well as a couple of friends who also read this blog (SettaKeys and Alan Goat) – to the local pub to watch Arsenal v West Ham. As you will of course know, the game finished 0-0.
Since then Morgana has watched every Arsenal game – excluding the 4-0 FA Cup win over Cardiff and the 1-0 Champions League victory over Roma – and every game has ended goalless. West Ham, Tottenham, Sunderland and Fulham. Throw in the Australia v Japan World Cup qualifier that she also watched and that equals five full games of football without ever seeing a goal scored.
It’s quite ridiculous really.
Now I could tell Morgana not to watch the game tomorrow – but that wouldn’t really break the curse. Indeed, it would only delay the threat of a 0-0 scoreline until the next time she watched. No, what we need is an antidote. And I think I have one.
I have asked my girlfriend – who goes by the name of Otter on the very rare occasions that she comments on this blog – to watch tomorrow’s game. You see, she has only seen one other game this season, the very first game of the campaign, against West Brom, the team we’re playing tomorrow.
And that is why I’m confident that Arsenal can break the curse of Morgana Clarke.
* * *
On a slightly more serious note I do feel that – Morgana Clarke or no Morgana Clarke, antidote or no antidote – Arsenal’s horrid goalless run will end tomorrow. Why? Simply because it has to.
We absolutely need to pick up three points against West Brom. They’re the bottom team in the league, play exactly the type of football that will allow us opportunities and are missing the only striker that can do some damage for them – our on-loan forward Jay Simpson. If they can’t be beaten then I really don’t know where we can turn.
The team news is OK. William Gallas is the only fresh injury to the squad but the very capable Johan Djourou will debutise in his absence. Aside from that the manager has said there will be minimum rotations to the side that drew with Fulham. My opinion is that both Carlos Vela and Andrey Arshavin will be dropped to give them some rest and provide a much needed threat of the bench, with Nicklas Bendtner and Emmanuel Eboue stepping in. I think the manager will stick with the 4-5-1 from the weekend and in my eyes it would be the right decision.
All I really care about tomorrow is that the boys put in 110%. The result is absolutely vital but what’s more important to me is that the players that are on display give absolutely everything they’ve got. Anything less would be infuriating given the opportunity that Aston Villa’s draw with Stoke has provided us and the quality of the opposition we’re playing.
I sincerely hope I return to you tomorrow as the satisfied and optimistic Arsenal supporter I used to be. Otherwise, I’d suggest you check for Morgana Clarke’s obituary in my local paper.
Have your say on the curse of Morgana Clarke or Arsenal v Fulham by leaving a comment.
{ 65 comments… read them below or add one }
We should get this Morgana Clarke to start watching Villa games, that would do us a world of good..lol.
On a serious note, it’s about time our bad luck runs out. I’d be more concerned if we weren’t creating any chances at all, so I’m not panicking just yet. Btw, was watching the Roma vs Inter game on Sunday, boy am I glad Rossi won’t feature in the 2nd leg, he’s fantastic in the middle of the park. Roma put 3 against Inter… should we be worried?
I agree whole heartedly with your prognosis. I have watched many games when Arsenal have been winning by a single goal and my wife has returned (manure supporter) and the opposition has scored, this can’t be a coincidence. It is amazing how an action that can have no physical effect on a game does! It is like the butterfly effect, where a butterfly flaps their wings and a tornado occurs/effected on the other side of the world. There are also many players who are supperstitious about what they wear i.e lucky underware! In a way you can understand how this may work as it could have a psycological effect on the player, whereas a supporter wearing or having a lucky mascot can have no effect on the outcome of the game whatsoever.
@ Dally – Morgana has ruined Arsenal and it’s time her run stops. On the other hand though, full credit to her for sticking with Arsenal despite the fact that she’s never seen a game with a goal being scored. That’s dedication!
seriously mate can I have her number if you don’t mind??
oh and arsenal win 3-1 tonight
@ geeksarecool – I don’t know if I’d be praised or shot if I gave it to you. I’ll withhold for now.
@Spanish Fry I think you should go to London and take out our worst performers tomorrow, instead of giving Morgana the bullet. It has to stop. Personally, I’ve stopped watching the games as it is all just too much and a waste of my precious time. Enought talk from players of the “Don’t count us out yet” and “Now we’re gonna show them” variety and not enough effort on the pitch.
Come Arsenal! I mean, WDF?
@ Spanish Fry
Again I agree with you, it is quite uncanny how I agree with most of your comments. Morgana’s luck has got to change but can we risk it? Maybe when we are assured of 4th place, we have won the FA Cup and Champions League, just maybe you could let her watch a pre-season friendly say against Barnet. They are shown live on arsenal.com. Did anybody take advantage of the free Saturday commentary of the Fulham game? I find the service excellent and don’t know what I would do without the match commentry. Being in Turkey a lot of the sites for downloading live football streams are banned i.e. sopcast, justin.tv etc so I don’t get to watch them. I sometimes go over the road to the sports centre but if a game over laps a Turkish league game then that is shown. Has anybody got any suggestions on how I can get games on the PC? I subscribed to get links, only £12 for two years but most links are to banned sites.
Firstly, you did no favours to Morgana by posting such a classy pic of her wrapped around a beer bottle.
Secondly I agree with the post, this goal drought has to stop, especially if they want UCL action next year.
I’ve predicted a 2-nil win for the Gunners tonight… in the hope that Arsh gets his first for the club and that RvP or Bendtner can hit the back of the net.
ps. send my regards to Morgana… oh and tell her I have a huge Organa.
Morgana Clarke is hot!
that’s a pretty pretty picture u have up there of her… maybe I could send you one of mine in a worse state and then maybe exchange numbers later? sounds like a plan to me.
This is hilarious. Go Morgana!
Morgana kinda looks a bit hammered in that photo.
Interesting to note that the name Morgana is presumably derived from the character of the same name from the Arthur myths. She was one of the people responsible for the fall of Arthur, and of Camelot.
Clearly, you can see where the relationship between Arsenal and this Morgana is leading!
@ Darragh – She wasn’t not hammered.
@SF
Sounds like you ‘are are’ hammered
@ mgeiks – A swift correction
Bloody hell with these posts i’m wondering if I stumbled on adult friend finder or the like haha.
@ dalley not sure but setenta sports might have some sort of service or if it’s just commentary you are after radio 5 live always has live prem matches and thats on the net?
We should hammer them 5-0 and i’m going to pissed if I have to get up early on my lay-in day to watch another 0-0.
Love the way you put a picture of a lady on the blog and thats it it….footballing commentary is out of the window!
Theres no way we can go another game with a goaless draw…surely….and against the bottom placed club. Why am i still not confident!!
0-0h t0-0 be a G0-0-0-0-0-0ner…
@Luxinbrasil
so you don’t mind a draw, as long as it’s goaless?
I say, we can’t go another game without 3 points… period
*not goaless
She’s cursed. Theres no doubt about it. 5 games and not one goal – unbelieveable. In her defence though has anyone noticed that Arsenal have not conceded one single goal since she starterd ‘supporting’ arsenal. Figures that her favourite player as Almunia.
Arsenal have to score sooner than later. I pray sooner.
Ah — Hello all, sorry for ruining Arsenal’s chances in the short term. I didn’t realise I would have such an impact on the game by merely watching it on the television.
@SF – Thank you for deciding to post this photo of me taken on New Years Eve at approximately 3am in the morning. I am sure I have never looked better.
@SF – You’re a dead man
@Alangoat – This is all your fault
@ anonymous – thanks
At least you have good taste in beer as well as the new football club.
@ Morgana_Clarke – well if you do decide to watch the game tonight by my reconing it will be 5.45am where you are, and you will deserve to see a goal. Please make it from Arsenal, and please if you do have anyway of influencing the result keep WBA score as nil.
Ps. you look much better than I ever do at 3am on new years eve, or at any other time if I would be honest, but there again I am a 46 year old balding man and not an attractive young girl.
@Morgana, you look much like Angelina Jolie!!!wooaahooo.Ive decided to change my destination bcoz of this photo,Im gonna chose Australlia to take up my study instead of Canada.Dont worry Morgana, you can still drink some 6 packs durin our wedding ceremony!!!But ure gonna have to watch AVilla instead of Arsenal.
We dfntly have to win tonite,lets break this curse.
Lol, hope your antidote works SF. But Morgana is fine lady, aren’t good looking women associated with good fortune? Anyway, hope she finally gets to see the real Arsenal tonight, the Arsenal we all fell in love with.
@Mgeiks
No…im with you on that….defnitely know we need and want the three points…just not sure my mind, heart and soul could take another goaless bout….Arsenal winning is the only result for me!!!
We need 3 points. The chase begins today…
Bad news- Bellamy wont play vs Aston Villa… Horrible timing for us but still hoping for a result…
Ok ok thats enough Morgana……leaving RVP on the bench!! playing Bentdner instead…what are you doing to us Clarke!
I dont think i can handle another draw tonight. If we draw, im calling in sick for the rest of the week.
When this nice blog turns into the SpanishFry Facebook ??
I will pretend that I never read this post.
SF: Thanks for a hot picture.
Morgan: Australian hot! I would love that!
Please, don’t watch tonight’s game so that we can score one goal. Haven’t seen a league goal for a long time.
P.S. Arshavin + Bentdner to score. 2-0 gunners. I don’t like predicting though.
Reason: Westbrom’s defence is not very strong. They are playing 4-4-2 which will suite Arsenal’s style. They also need a win to avoid relegation. But we need more desperately.
Come on Gunners!
Just to cheer me up brasilian telly are showing the peno shoot out from the carling cup final…i forgot to mention how happy i was at our old friend Mr Bentley for missing his pen in woeful fashion!!!
Right…..its the Bentdner show!
YES WE CAN; YES WE CAN SCORE GOALS!
Come on Gunners!
Bendtner’s second goal was very van Persie if I may say so myself. I bet Morgana is asleep on the couch, the berk.
Your antidote is working SF! 3 goals and Bendy is having a brilliant game!
A win and some goals. Huzzah! The Otter did her job, although I was just a tad worried when Eboue went walkabout from the wall for that free-kick.
However, reports indicate that Morgana slept through the game.
Great performance, now all we need is some consistancy. Arshavin is a great tallent, very quick, clever and sneaky little fella, i love him to bits. Bendy also was superb, thats 11 goals from the 21 year old this season folks, i bet it will be 20 goals per season from him in a few years.
@ Gibbs – Both Arshavin and Bendtner was superb. Has anyone else noticed that Bendtner seems to play particularly well with a smaller, nippier strike partner? His goals tend to come alongside Vela, Eduardo and now Arshavin.
I’ve just received confirmation that Morgana did not get up to watch the game. The curse remains, and I will do my best to ensure she never watches an Arsenal game again.
@ SF
Yeah, i agree about Bendy. almost like Ade and Eduardo, Ade was lethal when he played with Eddy, deadly combo. I guess Bendy is the same.
Lol, Morgana can watch Arsenal play SF, just make sure Otter also watches the games.
Wenger:
“It’s a fine line,” said Wenger. “I have watched Man United get an opening here and there and they are a great side. But I don’t feel they dominate the games like we do.
Seriously this guy needs to stop smoking crack. I have watched arsenal play this season and trust me they do not dominate sides…his lost the plot. He rates his players too highgly…
Guys this is just one game against a struggling side. lets not get ahead of ourselves. we are not out of the hole yet. AV still need to lose tomorrow and ManCiteh. great to finally see some goals come through but its just one small step in the right direction.
Finally a win. Now I can look forward to an blog about football tomorrow.
Did clichy play? my fav player has looked sooooooo quiet in the last couple of games maybe gibbs should of been out tonight. These are the real arsenal fans in the stand tonight as they made my fancy telly work with all the noise hats off to the traveling gooners.
Great performance but we need to back it up against burnly and bendtner will make them pay for the cc knockout and after tonights performance he would be worth 10 bucks on.
Did clichy play? my fav player has looked sooooooo quiet in the last couple of games maybe gibbs should of been out tonight. These are the real arsenal fans in the stand tonight as they made my fancy telly work with all the noise hats off to the traveling gooners.
Great performance but we need to back it up against burnly and bendtner will make them pay for the cc knockout and after tonights performance he would be worth 10 bucks on.
C’mon St Nick!
@ Butterfingers – yes clichy did play.
3-1 – Critics where are you now?? Niklas hits 2, Toure gets 1. The big dane seems to score a fair amount of goals but when we are in need of the most (Burnley, Man Utd, Roma) he doesnt seem to come up with them, he is a confusing player. But hey he got 2 and we got 3 points, COME ON CITY TOMORROW, gap is now 3 points between us and villa
Goals:::::
Finally we scored a goal from an open play. Hats off for Bendtner and Arshavin. Bentdner, once again proved that he has talent and ability. Good technical skills added with footballing knowledge. Vision. Two years before I told that Bendtner will have better career than Adebayor. I still hold my statement cause I rate this kid. This season, he has been wrongly criticized many times which is sad. The kid is only 21 and he has performed very well in big times for Arsenal except few games. But he has to improve his finishing and first touch skills to be a good striker.
Arshavin is really amazing player: very quick feet, dribbling skills and agile brain. When Cesc returns, they will form a solid understanding between them since both are intelligent players. Arshavin is very similar with Hleb with scoring boots. He will be amazing if played as No. 10 behind the striker.
We played very well in the first half bar freekick. Almunia could have done better positionally for the goal. Most important thing of all, we scored and win.
The game was against a relegation battling side with poor defense. We can say more about this team tuesday night. If we get past Roma that would make a wonderful week for Arsenal. I hope Wenger and his team are motivating themselves for a huge match.
Finaly we agree ramugunner- Bendtner is equal to or better then Ade already and he will only improve…
I think the match against Roma will be the match of the round of 16. Something crazy is going to happen- hopefully we end up on top…
Arshavin is quite a player and he has not shown his best yet…
Momoney: That’s whats up! I definitely like Bendtner’s effort. He ain’t perfect but at least he tries. Bayor’ is overated, overpaid fella. Need to release ‘Bayor this summer. If 30k Bendtner can perform better than 80k ‘Bayor, isn’t ‘Bayor the waste of the money invested by fans like me. In my eyes, he is.
I also said with Almunia in goal, Arsenal won’t win a premier league or champions league ever. I hold my statement. No team has ever won a PL or CL without an international goalie. Can’t write off Fabianski so early but I don’t think he is the answer.
Night!
@ Ronaldo7 – Quiet you. Let us enjoy a win in peace for once!
@Spanish Fry re: Big B and nippy strike partners. I too have noticed that as well. He doesn’t work well with Ade (they seem to run into each other all the time!).
Morgs Morgs Morgs, how could you use your supernatural powers to do this to the beloved Arsenal…
@spanish fry – I’m sure you could have used a less drunken photo of Morgs to place on your well read blog. This news has turned me off supporting Arsenal, it seems anything can happen once you decide to do so.
At last we won! Hope Villa will lose points today. I still hope for 3 place – so at 14th of March I will support MU in the clash with Scousers..
BTW. The first goal pass to Toure by ArshaWin!=)
@ Louise – Heh heh. Go back to your Chelsea boys.
Sorry Spanish…ill let you guys enjoy the win.
If arsenal have Fab, Arshavin, Rosiky, walcot in a starting line up they will look good….all very small players though that are injury prone.
Still dont rate your big Dane. Think his a bit of a spastic…with a bad first touch. Ade has heavy pockets (eg. too much money and its got to him)…happens to players.
@ Ronaldo7 – Did you watch the game? Bendtner showed good potential. More of that and he’ll be a good player.
@ Ronaldo7
At 21, Bendtner has scored 11 goals this season.
Berbatov, at 28 has scored 12 goals this season, Rooney(24) with 14 and Tevez(25) with 10.
Bendy is a 4th choice striker but he is right up there with the best in the EPL. I think he is a threat to other teams and he must be taken seriously.
Great to be back on the scoring sheet, and good that Bendtner got 2. RvP is in my fantasy team though, oh well we all have to make sacrifices.
@Spanish Fry, I was wondering, when you were on the air with arseblogger he asked you how you became an arsenal supporter. I was wondering if it would be of interest (as I think I am a bit older than the average blogger on your site, 46) how I became an arsenal fan and in fact a bit of history of the lean years. Arsenal have not always been a top 4 team. Anyway as it is your site please let me know.
0-0h t0-0 be a G0-0-0-0-0-0ner – I was a “little bit” ironic there….
i commence on issue of cesc fabragas injuy
What the hell is with the Drunkin chick in the photo – and Why did I read that…
Somethings are a waiste of web space *THIS is one of those things
Thankfully employers will be looking at things like this and people like you will find it harder to get a job.
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